Cut back on the descriptives a bit.ellie1993Report 2012-03-07 00:30:05heyy everybody, i just sat down to write the next installment, after not being able to sleep all night! Cut back on the descriptives a bit.ellie1993Report 2012-03-07 00:30:05heyy everybody, i just sat down to write the next installment, after not being able to sleep all night! duly notedombligoReport 2012-03-07 05:40:37I guess it is a “Dark and Stormy Night” where you are? There’s literary times to do this but rarely in the same chapter or especially paragraph to paragraph.ellie1993Report 2012-03-07 08:21:34Haha i do get into the story abit… whoopsies… But as a nit picky point, you jumped between 1st and 3rd person a lot. duly notedombligoReport 2012-03-07 05:40:37I guess it is a “Dark and Stormy Night” where you are? But as a nit picky point, you jumped between 1st and 3rd person a lot. But as a nit picky point, you jumped between 1st and 3rd person a lot. 5 comments«1»ellie1993Report 2012-03-07 17:02:17yeah i do tend to write like this anyway i like to have different perspectives on how a character reacts or behaves its a
