I also got several offers of soccer scholarships and was thrilled when one came from Paul’s university. Naturally we were all disappointed. “No you don’t, bro, NO YOU DON’T,” I laughed. I couldn’t restrain myself. Some, I know, never learn that. It lifted the lid off some feelings that I’d never felt for my brother. It was a huge gamble, a huge investment that each of us made in trusting the other to never tell anyone, not our best friends, not our boyfriends or girlfriends…no one…of our incest. I can’t tell you what Paul was feeling, what made him do it, but I can say that I was driven by a mix of love, lust, curiosity and an unacknowledged sense of competition with some of my girlfriends, a few of whom were happy to admit to having pleasured their boyfriends – or any boys – with blowjobs. Until then Paul and I had been the most typical of typical siblings, older brother and younger sister, probably closer than most due to our shared athleticism.
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